Posts by Woman know your place

When my mum and step dad seperated for a brief period, against the advice of the elders, it was about the time I was due to go on the platform at the circuit assembly to give an experience about witnessing at school.

The elders met with me and told me I couldnt go on the platform as they thought it was 'inappropriate' and they acted as if I was the one who was seperating from a partner.....

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

Hi Mary?. I just feel that being bitter or mean will just reinforce to her that I am a sinner?. If I act mercifully and kindly towards her, she cannot accuse me of being unchristian?. And she does need financial assistance. She doesn?t talk to me because she thinks she is doing what is best for me?.. I love my family and I know they are just horribly misguided? they don?t want to hurt me?.

You are right jgnat, it would be hard to keep up the charade, and reinstatement would really be an act of desperation?. I guess it would be hypocritical of me to go back and then lie about my intentions, as the reason I left was that I didn?t want to pretend to be someone I wasn?t or to follow a religion I had serious doubts about?.. and Desi, good point that my family might choose not to talk to me anyway

I guess this post is as a result of a picture of my bother on the net, he won something at school, and he has grown up so much I hardly recognized him? it just stirred a horribly aching and sadness inside me.

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

Thanks talesin, confusedjw and erich...

At least my brother know I love them and that no one can ever stop me loving them.... an I will not mess up my life so that the elders can use me as an example to my brothers!

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

That's a good point talesin... I write to my mother and brother regularly to keep them up to date, and I always say that no matter what I am here for them, and also send cheques and presents, as my mum doesnt have much money. I hope that they see that my life is good and that I am a good person.... I send them details of various chaity projects I'm involved in, and the help I've been able to give people... maybe, just maybe, they might see that there is more out there.....

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

Thanks for your replies....

It's my mother who's really stopping me from seeing my little brothers... she calls me very occasionally (about 5 times since I was DA'd) with a 'business' matter to discuss... you know how they say if there are business or familt matters, then limited contact is allowed.... so she'll call me of she get's a letter addressed to me etc and then start asking about how I'm doing, then get anxious and have to hang up.... I don't see her leaving as she desperately needs the religion... she had a very tough life and met her first JW, who studied with her, in hospital shortly after her second suicide attempt....

Just before I was DA'd, she told me she had to 'protect her children' from me, so she couldnt allow me to see them...

So then, it looks like I'll have to get reinstated if i want to see them again..... there is a chance that in a year or so I could get a transfer with work to another country.... maybe a year beforehand I could start the process of gettig reinstated, then move away and let them think i was attending meetings in my new country.... at least I could then talk to them on the phone and go visit them..... i hate being deceitful but I love my brothers so much, I can't bear the thought of never seeing them again....

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

Bugger!

I was so depressed, angry and confused at the time that I really went about leaving in the wrong way...

Unfortunately, my 17 year old brother is now a regular pioneer, and refuses to take my calls.... although when once I called and he tolld me he couldnt speak to me, I said I loved him and he said he loved me too, before hanging up. I really don't foresee him leaving, he hasn't an ounce of rebellion in him.

As for my half-brother, he's only five and there's no way my mother will let me near him.... he was three when I left so will probably not even remember me....

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

As I said..... because I miss my little brother sand want to see them

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

P.S. folks.... I was baptized at 12... can I debate with the elders whether I was truly capable of making a life decision at that age, or is this approach futile?

Thanks!

21

Can I withdraw a Disassociation?

by Woman know your place in

jw
friends

i'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me..... two years ago i decided to leave the jws, and when i met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (i told them i doidnt believe in god and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile).

at the time i thought that telling them would just mean that i could get on with my life and they would know that i was not a jw... i thought that you could only df a person who wilfully sinned against god.... well i didnt believe in god, so how could i wilfully sin against him?

anyway, as i said, the elders wanted to df me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, i wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the dfing.. so did the elders have grounds to df me?

Woman know your place

Hello,

I'm new to the site, and wonder can anyone advise me....

Two years ago I decided to leave the JWs, and when I met with the elders to inform them, they told me they had grounds to disfellowship me (I told them I doidnt believe in God and had slept with my boyfriend.....for full story see my profile). At the time I thought that telling them would just mean that I could get on with my life and they would know that I was not a JW... I thought that you could only DF a person who wilfully sinned against God.... well I didnt believe in God, so how could I wilfully sin against him?

Anyway, as I said, the elders wanted to DF me, and, not wanting to be seen as a sinner, I wrote a letter of disassociation detailing my reasons for not believing ahead of the DFing.

So did the elders have grounds to DF me? Is being known as a JW and breaking the rules enough reason, even though I did not believe?

Can I withdraw a letter of disassociation? Or do I have to be reinstated? If so, how long does it usually take to get reinstated, and how long do I need to wait before 'fading away'?.... No one in my congregation or the congregations neary had ever been DFd or DAd so I don't know how it works, and of course I got rid of all my literature when I left.

I should have faded away in the first place, but I hadn't realised the consequences of my meeting with the elders... the reason I want to withdraw the disssociation is that my two little brothers can't have contact with me, and I miss them desperately...

Does anyone have any advice? Whilst I feel strongly opposed to the JW belief, I'm willing to swallow my pride if it means I can see my little brothers again... one thing I believe is that family comes before everything else, unlike the JW belief...